Whilst on my flight from London to Mumbai, the elderly woman sat behind me, wearing a baby pink saree, started shouting at me in Hindi and shaking my chair violently. She had swapped seats with one of her family members as I was happily snoozing, she really didn't like that my seat was reclined and exploded with anger towards me. It was quite surreal. I didn't cry, but I know that if I could have done if I were in a different mood (yes, I'm a sensitive soul).
Years ago, someone told me that you should always smile at strangers because that smile may be the only smile that person sees all day. That smile might lift their mood and bring them some joy. That small gesture of kindness which only takes a moment has the power to turn someone's day around. None of us know what is happening in the lives of the strangers who walk around us, who we stand next to in queues, answer our call to customer services or sit behind us on aeroplanes...
I always smile at strangers if we happen to lock eyes, it's become a habit of mine. Whilst in England that hasn't given me any problems. It's common etiquette (doesn't always happen mind you, but it is normal). In India I've had to really rein that habit in because it's been mistaken for something different. When I first moved to India, I smiled at a guy who was staring at me (the mythical foreigner in India), and he followed me and it became scary. He mistook the innocent smile for flirtation. I now avoid eye contact with men, and only smile at women and children. It makes me feel mean but unfortunately that experience has taught me that smiling at strangers is not common. My experiences have taught me that etiquette in India is very different from what I was brought up with, for example people laugh at me for saying 'thank you' when someone gives me something!
Anyway, I digress...
I could have turned around and shouted back at this woman in the baby pink saree for disturbing me in such a violent way when I was perfectly within my rights to have my seat reclined as there wasn't any food being served but who knows how she was feeling on that flight back to India. She may have had the worst day of her life. I didn't say anything and begrudgingly tried to put my seat up straight. The violent shaking must have done something to the mechanism inside the chair because it would not go up! I shook it upright and all was calm and uncomfortable once again.
Kindness towards strangers costs nothing. Next time you want to explode at a stranger (or have been exploded upon), be mindful and try to be kind.
