Before I moved to United States in 2001, I lived in Nigeria for five years without my mother. My mom was in the States because two of my older siblings were here. After 2001, I grew up with my mother and all my siblings in the States without my father. Technically, I grew up in single-parent household. Yes, my parents are still married.
I don’t look at any of these guys negatively; they all came into my life to show me how emotional distraught I was. I don’t blame them for the negative outcomes of our friendships. That’s the first step to healing, forgiving the past, learning from it and moving on.
Guy Mr C is one of the most selfish people I have ever met. He is very smart yet selfish. I remember when I was telling a friend about him and she said something that stuck to me. She said, “it’s about integrity.” Mr. C has achieved a lot for himself at such a young age. He is a pharmacist and currently in school for his Phd in nanomedicine. I am very proud of his accomplishments.
The lessons I learned from Mr. C:
1.When someone shows you, who they are, believe them immediately and treat them accordingly.
2. Don’t invest your time and energy into someone who is selfish and self-centered.
3. Please be careful with guys who are quick to anger.
4. Guys like this, already know what they want, if it’s not you. My dear, move on..
5. Don’t allow a guy’s intelligence cloud your judgment.
*Great guy for someone else. NOT ME!!! Good luck Mr. C.
Mr. D is one of my favorites. I liked this guy for a long time. I talked to him for 5 years without dating him. Love to him is like a beauty contest; the prettiest girl will always win. He is also very intelligent. Don’t judge me; I have a thing for smart guys. We would have dated if he wasn’t also trying to date one of my other friends (shaking my head).
Lessons I learned from Mr. D:
1. Do not talk to a guy for five years without dating him
2. A guy who can’t focus on one person at a time is not for you.
3. A guy doesn’t put God first is a waste of time.
4. Learn to love yourself first before someone can love you.
Even though things didn’t work with Mr. D, I am thankful for those five years. I learnt a lot about myself and what I really wanted. I believe in growing, so the next guy I date has to be better than Mr. D. I have to applaud Mr. D for helping me set such a high-standard.
*Great guy with a great future. I am thankful for those 5 years.
I grew up in a home without my father present yes, it was tough learning about guys but I had to take it one experience at a time. To ladies like me: never blame the absence of your dad as the reason for your failed relationships. Learn from your mistakes, know yourself and never stop loving yourself.
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