Humor Magazine

"The Expense of Spirit in a Waste of Shame"

By Davidduff

'Our Will' used those words in Sonnet 129 to describe the shame of illicit sex with 'The Dark Lady'.  However, they will also do nicely to sum up the contents of Ed Balls' sick-bag of a speech which he tipped over an unenthusiastic audience yesterday.  True, he did mutter an apology for previous bad behaviour, such as spending our money like a drunken sailor, and he promised - really, really promised - never to do it again.  This promise is roughly akin to the one we chaps used to make back in the day, 'if you let me put it in I promise not to come' - yeeeeeees, quite!  Well, sometimes a girl would believe it if you had primed her with enough gin and tonic but are there any sentient adults in this, our 'septic Isle', who would believe Ed Balls if he told you the time of the day?

I suppose the 'comrades' in the hall yesterday believed it but as paid-up members of the Labour party they have proved, ipso facto, that not only are they insentient but actually brain dead!  I cannot believe that anyone else would believe him, any more than they are going to believe his 'boss' this afternoon.  Incidentally, why does the word 'boss' and the name 'Ed Miliband' seem to be such an ill-fit?   There is just something about the 'goopy-bloopy Milipede' which tells you that not only couldn't he command anything, one suspects that without a wife he might have difficulty getting dressed in the mornings!  Of course, none of that ineffectuality means he isn't an A1 dirty rat - just ask his brother!

The sad fact is that all of our political leaders today our second, or even third, raters, incapable of seizing and expressing a 'Big Idea'.  After 'that woman' drove a stake into the heart of socialism, her heirs and successors  are just a bunch of tinkerers playing around on the periphery of our society.  There is an argument for saying that that is "A Good Thing" because 'Big Ideas' frequently bring 'Big Problems'!  As things are at present, we can allow our second-raters to play around because they are so utterly useless that they're not likely to do much harm.

 


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