Don’t worry, it is actually Safe For Work. Because, despite its “interesting” name, rimadog.com is not actually the latest, hot new site for dog-lovers, it’s just a site for people who love their dogs (no, not in that way; get your mind out of the gutter).
No, although the sniggers just keep on coming, keep on rising up into my mind, rimadog.com is actually a perfectly innocuous new website that serves to provide information about their new dogging – I mean, doggy – drug, ‘Rimadyl’.
Or is it?
For you, my dear readers, I go on an intrepid journey into the beast to find out, and investigate the hole website. First stop for real doggy [style] lovers will obviously be joining the RimaDog Community. Though this is not for the faint-hearted: Pfizer first wants to ‘get your basic scent’. Honestly Pfizer, bit fresh for a first date isn’t it? We haven’t even met IRL yet! I’m just not that sort of girl. Soz.
Not quite ready for that kind of commitment, I decide to find out a bit more about this community, and click on ‘What’s a RimaDog?’.
Oh dear. Not looking good for Pfizer. Apparently ‘the #1 NSAID for canine relief’ produces these ominous side-effects: ‘A RimaDog is a dog who wags his tail and means it’ – is this a reference to ‘no means yes?’ No means no, Pfizer! No matter how much your partner wags his or her ‘tail’. Honestly, 101 of sexual harassment…back to sex-ed for Pfizer.
More do[d]gy still, a RimaDog is apparently ‘frisky’ and ‘spunky’. Look, Pfizer, being ‘frisky’ doesn’t necessarily equate to an invitation to get ‘spunky’. Lawsuit waiting to happen, that type of rhetoric.
So with all these worrying hints by Pfizer, I put it to them: what kind of relief are you really proposing for these poor mutts? Someone call the RSPCA!
I’m nearly out of doggy-style puns, so I’ll just flip this over and end on a semi [!! lol] serious note: how on earth did this ever make it out of the very first meeting where it was introduced? Doesn’t Pfizer have a ‘WTF?’ department? Because, by the looks of this website, they definitely need one.
On the other hand, I have to thank Pfizer for cheering up an otherwise very dull morning. So, on balance, my final message to Pfizer is, keep on rimming! (Just maybe leave the dogs out of it; not sure a tail-wag constitutes informed consent.)