Dear Single, Straight Men,
As a newly single woman who's been out of the dating game for several years, I implore you to please read this letter and keep this in mind as you navigate through the dating world.
There are some topics that have been brought to my attention during these last few months. Here goes nothing:
- Communication: With all these advances in technology, we are supposed to be able to have more frequent (and ideally, better) communication with each other. I know you're busy (I am too) but I'd appreciate it if you'd occasionally text me while at work just to say hi or ask how my day is going. I don't need a novel- just a couple phrases. When you do this, I get happy and excited. It makes my day a bit brighter even when it sucks. Honesty is generally a good policy...but there is a time and a place for everything. Talking too much during romantic moments is not sexy. It's distracting.
- Compliments: When done right, they work. When done poorly, they make me feel awkward. For me, the f-bomb should not be used in any statement meant to flatter me. I can't speak for other women but it does nothing good for me.
- General grooming: Gentlemen, dating has inadvertently caused me to spend a lot more time and money on my grooming than I planned on. While I don't expect you to be a metrosexual, please trim your hedges and wax your back if you need to. I get waxed. Yes, it hurts but I do it anyway. Please take care of your hands and feet too.
- Planning dates: I love it when you have a couple date ideas (restaurant ideas, etc.) in mind. It tells me that you're proactive and thoughtful. Just don't suggest getting tattoos or skydiving, ok?
- Clothing: I know a lot of men have said that they don't have much of a fashion sense. That's fine. Just don't wear the same shirt or outfit twice in a row. Please don't wear Ed Hardy.
- Trying new things: Generally, a fantastic idea for both of us as long as no one feels uncomfortable or gets hurt. So far, I have been pleasantly surprised when guys have asked me to try out things out of my comfort zone. However, don't abuse this. Otherwise, I'll make you do something very girlie with me.
- Cooking: Seriously, it's not as hard as it seems. If you can read and follow directions, you can cook. I'm not expecting you to be Bobby Flay but if your idea of cooking means boiling water and adding ramen noodles, I'm going to mock you and that will be the end of the evening. Make a "real" meal for me and I'll show you my appreciation. (Nudge, nudge, wink, wink)
- Reading about the opposite sex: Occasionally, I will read men's magazines and websites for insight. I want to know what you guys read about, listen to, watch, talk about, etc. A few guys I've dated have admitted to reading a couple women's magazines for some ideas. Let's just say, doing your homework pays off.
Sabrina (Bree) P.