Oh Fail, Toe NailBy Dianelaneyfitzpatrick
A lot of people with cameras and no sense of shame have extremely ugly feet, as it turns out. Human feet even at their best look pretty weird if you look at them long enough. The ones with long curly yellow toenails and bones sticking out at weird angles make you wonder how these people can walk around.
The ugliness I can understand. There’s a lot of weight put on our feet. We cram them into 6-inch heels with pointy toes and old running shoes. But according to the Internet photos, lots of people are just not cutting their toenails. What’s with that? Sure, it will take a small power saw, but for cripe’s sake, fire that thing up and get rid of those talons.
My only-moderately-unsightly feet are because of my big toenails. For being so big and hard, my big toenails are apparently super sensitive. They got pushed on by my running shoes for two work-outs last week and they just up and died.
After the second day at the gym, I decided I better switch shoes. But it was too late. My toenails were hurting and hurting and hurting. By the seventh day, I decided I better take off the nail polish and see what was going on under there.
A lot was going on.
My big toenails are dead.
I’m not sure I could get any of the Vietnamese nail salon people to give me a pedicure. I don’t want to be the subject of the tales they tell when they go home at night. I’m looking at the calendar and hoping I don’t have anywhere I need to be in the next few months, where I can’t wear a pair of fuzzy slippers.
My friend Kathy tells me the same thing happened to her from wearing ill-fitting ski boots once. She said it was a year before her toenail was normal again.
Looks like that foot modeling job I had my eye on is out of the question now. But I might post some photos on the Internet just to join the fun.
These articles might interest you :
“I’m going to be in front of the closet. OK.. and then.. AHHHH”Two cool tricks in one! Pulling out a table cloth, AND making a kid disappear! Read moreBy Bestfunnyblog
Steampunk Glamor Bee Brooch on EtsyOh my Neo-Victorian, Steampunk Valentine...this is just for you!Steampunk Glamor Bug Necklace on Etsy Neo-Victorian is an... Read moreBy Dianefergurson
BODY, MIND, SPIRIT, CULTURE, LIFESTYLE, SELF EXPRESSION, SHOPPING, SPIRITUALITY
Glasses on, glasses off. What a pain....The answer? Wear an eyeglass necklace!The versatility of the eyeglass necklaces that I design make them a unique... Read moreBy Dianefergurson
ART & DESIGN, BODY, MIND, SPIRIT, CULTURE, SELF EXPRESSION, SPIRITUALITY
From The P.A.R.T.Y Program’s YouYube page — I saw this video at the trauma conference I attended a couple of weeks ago. More information on The P.A.R.T.Y... Read moreBy Torontoemerg
SOCIAL MEDIA, TECH
I just found a really great set of indian inspired paper goods (ceremony programs, table numbers, menus, place cards) on Oh So Beautiful Paper that I thought I... Read moreBy Sapphiresandsaffron
ARTS & CRAFTS, HOME, LIFESTYLE
Sometimes I fantasize about what my life would be like if I became a journalist instead of an attorney. But then I read headlines like the ones below, and I am... Read moreBy Jhop
I could write a book on diets from both a personal and professional perspective. I along with many, many adults have tried a variety of diets. In the 80’s it... Read moreBy Expatdoctormom1
DIET & WEIGHT, HEALTH
MOST POPULAR FROM HUMOR
- The Top 10 Longest Rivers in the UK by Russell Deasley
- The Top 10 Largest Lakes in the UK by Russell Deasley