Apologies for not replying to comments yesterdayI just didn't have the energyThe last few days have been exhausting And it's taken a tollStupidly I really let those negative comments get to me My mood suffered My family noticed They kept telling me to shake it offBut being as hyper sensitive as I amIt took me a whileI want to thank all of you for your kind words and thoughtful comments over the last weekKnowing that you are there makes this whole blogging experience worthwhile But I'm done defending myself Especially against faceless, nameless anonymous comments I guess it all points to the fact that my self esteem and self worth are not in a great placeAnd I need to work on that As they say in AARecovery happens sometimes quickly, sometimes slowlyIt's not something that can be measuredBut it's definitely something to look atBut lookThese problems are small fry compared to some You may think I have an easy life anonymousBut you only see a fraction of my life I don't write about my familyAnd the issues going on there I have much that I don't write about So please Don't judge meYou have no right to
So I'm not backing downI'm not going to leave bloggerIt means too much to me You mean too much to me And for what it's worth I'm not giving up on recovery eitherAnd am trying my best to get back on trackYes I have lost weight But I am doing everything in my power to put the brakes onIt's not easy Once my ED is given half a chance It jumps in to drivers seatAnd takes over the whole show Let's hope this is a slip more than a relapse
Some of you pointed out that blogging the way I do is like a job I've always thought that Blogging is something I do at the same time every dayIn the same placeOften I have to research something before I write about it And I reply to comments which also takes time Granted It's not a paid job But I get something so much more than money from writing this blog I do it because I love itBecause I hope it helps others Because I feel compelled to share my story and experiences In the hope that it will go some way to fight the battle against eating disorders SoI'm here to stay Even if anonymous would rather I go and cry in the corner I guess the thing is not to react to these comments It only gives them powerI'm not prepared to do that any more And interestingly Anonymous did not comment on my last post
Anyway That's it from me today This is the last time I write about this subjectI am done defending myself I'm off to walk my dogs And spend a lazy Sunday Yes anonymous What a lazy, unemployed waste of space I am.....