New TB Season 5 Spoilers

There are some new True Blood Season 5 spoilers floating around…and we think you’ll happen to like these ones!

WARNING: If you don’t want to know – don’t read below!

Now, these are only rumors…not 100% sure if they’re true or not…but here goes!

Queen King Bill has his crown stripped by the Authority – due to his involvement and conspiracy with Nan.
Contrary to previous reports…the bromance will NOT be between Eric and Bill…but Alcide and Bill. Remember their hot eye-sex in season 3? Our sources tell us, the producers thought they would capitalize on their hot chemistry!

Tara will become a ghost, who communicates her last will and testament to Lafayette before moving on to the afterlife. One of those named in her will is Sookie, who has now entered the cage match fighting ring, and is battling it out with the fighting name “Sookie Monster”.  We hear she’s got a mean right-hook!

Eric becomes Sookie’s cage match promoter; creating lots of time for Eric and Sookie lovin’. Not only that, but the execs have realized where the fans’ true interest lies, and will be devoting 38 minutes of screen-time per episode for our couple!
Bill moves to Peru at the end of the season and falls in love with a very lovin’ llama. Where they’ll live happily-ever-after, and never to be heard from again.
In a more behind-the-scenes kind of news…you’ll be happy to know that ALL of the writers have been replaced by some of our favorite fanfic writers! Word is, they will be following the books more closely in the future – with a strong emphasis on Eric and Sookie!

Do these sound almost too good to be true?

Well, we hate to break it to you BUT…

Ha-ha! LMAO!

Sorry…we really wish there were spoilers such as these. We hate to get your hopes up, only to bring them down again. We just thought it might be a nice way to share our wishes for the upcoming season, as well as to make an April Fool’s Day joke! We hope you found it funny too…or at least got a kick out of the spoilers we wrote!

Since it’s April 1st…you know what that means, don’t you?

ONE MORE MONTH UNTIL DEADLOCKED COMES OUT!

Feel free to give us shit, your thoughts or share any other “April Fool’s Day” spoilers you might have in mind! Sound off in the comments below!