It Wasn't All Getting Attacked
Sitting on the darkening beach, I looked across the horizon and thought just for a moment about going to sleep right there.
It was 2009 and I was on Lonely Beach on the island of Koh Chang in Thailand. I was waiting for my pension money from the Korean government, but otherwise content as could be. I seemed to have it all. I had time to kill, beautiful surroundings and happiness. What I didn’t have, of course, was a shirt on. I didn’t have shoes on, either
I looked out in the distance where the lights were and made my decision: not tonight. Not this time. So, I got up, dusted myself off, and headed to what I thought was safety. I got to the restaurant-bungalow area. I got there and sighed with relief: safety.
I still wasn’t home, though.
I still had to walk in between barbed wire and down a darken path to get to my little hovel I was calling home for the night. Tonight was my first night and I was still working to get the lay of the land.
I passed the restaurant-bungalow area and noticed someone following me. He had a bandana on and seemed to want to pass me. I was quickly getting closer and closer to the barbed wire and so I went to the side to let him go ahead.
Then the asshole attacked me!
“You slept with my wife!” he yelled as he started to strangle me. He had what seemed like a thick French accent.
“I’m sorry!” not knowing what to say. I tried to think, “Had I slept with anyone’s wife lately?” I still regret saying “I’m sorry,” when I should have said “Fuck off.”
Thank God I Wasn't Going Through That At The Time
Anyway, he chased me around a little bit and I rushed back to the lighted area. I still to this day think about what could have happened to me had I been going through the whole in the barbed wire when he attacked. But let’s not think about that.
I thought maybe I could just wait him out, but I soon realized he was probably going to come after me again. I noticed there were some people hanging out near me and pleaded for help.
“There’s someone after me!”
“I don’t believe you, man” one of them said.
“I’m serious! Please come with me. Please,” I begged.
The guy with the bandana came out of the darkness.
“I know you!” he said.
“I know you, too,” I said.
“Look,” I said turning back to the small group of people. “This guy is after me! He’s going to hurt me if I don’t get some help!”
Somehow, I got someone from the group to help me – eventually one of them told me they were high on mushrooms – and the guy came out of the shadows again and smacked in the face.
He knocked me glasses off – I never saw them again – and the people who were helping me finally started to understand that maybe this was real and serious.
Someone walked me to where I was staying while some other people dealt with crazy French guy. He was probably high on something as well. Sigh.
I learned my lesson that night. The rest of my time in Koh Chang and Southeast Asia was interesting, as well. I’ll write more on that, later.