Photo: Getty Images- Troy Ballard
I suppose that on paper a full blow-out brawl between two rap-stars, their entourages and a Frenchmen with silky-smooth on-court abilities in a New York City nightclub sounds.. badass.
Of course, that is until -- the entire club is destroyed (alright, that's very badass), Chris Brown and Drake have now essentially imploded any chance of ever doing a featured album together (I know they had a beef before this, but I was still hoping) and Tony Parker nearly losing an eye.
And, yes, you can thank me for not using the overused 'all fun and games' line anytime you'd like.
But on a more serious note, Parker was seriously flirting with danger. The All-Star point guard for the San Antonio Spurs was hitting some clubs in NYC like the bachelor that he is, and suddenly found himself in the midst of a full-blown gangsta throw-down.
But don't allow me to be so noble. Chances are, like any half-way decent Frenchmen who is looking to party in New York, Tony was pounding back shots like the infamous Dennis Rodman.
And with drinking comes that super slow reaction time. As quick as Parker can be on the court with his cuts in the lane, the same didn't apply in the club as a shard of glass flew and (despite what I would assume was his most grand effort) scratched the retina in his left eye.
First off -- the whole thing, although being a serious incident, is funny. Flat out funny. Everything from the fact that this nightclub allowed Brown and Drake in on the same night, to Parker likely totally blitzed standing as these two dudes and a bunch of cronies ripped into eachother and while gawking at this brawl unfold, Tony has a shard of glass hit his eye.
Imagine that. Really, do me that favor. Just imagine that exact scene unfolding.
Since the incident, Parker has filed a lawsuit for $20 million against the nightclub. This comes after he had to have a small shard of glass surgically removed from his retina. He has not motioned at all that he has any plans to drag Brown and Drake into the mix, but if news regarding his eye doesn't improve drastically -- I'd venture to think anything is on the table.
The raucous amount of money is based off of the possibility of lost salary. As of this moment, Parker is currently sitting in his hotel room in New York and seeing every specialist he can find. The risk of infection is extraordinarily high, and he has been boycotted from even contemplating going to France to practice with the French team for the London Oympics.
I'm no doctor -- but I am quite good at reading between the lines -- Parker isn't going to be at the Olympics.
Don't start sweating bullets yet, San Antonio.
The incident with Parker is basically going to do one thing in the next few months -- when the Team France plays Team USA instead of being a beat-down even with Parker playing, it's going to be a total wash for four quarters without him. This injury still has not had any knock on Spurs' basketball, and time for a full recovery is in favor of San Antonio.
You would have to think that someone who is as sharp as Parker would have had the awarness to realize that once a fight broke out, it wasn't the most optimal place to be. But, hey, maybe he was trying to snag that perfect Instagram picture, and that's when things went south. Maybe Parker thought it'd be wise to jump in the middle and try to break things up and be a French Superman.
Or my personal favorite -- Parker really wasn't thinking after a fun night and simply found himself watching a death match unfold before him. He was a victim of being a bystander -- not exactly the best reasoning in court.
There's no reason to panic yet, but if for any reason Parker's recovery is stalled, and he misses any portion of next season -- Spurs' nation may have to send a few strongly worded letters to Brown and Drake.
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