Diet & Weight Magazine

If She Wasn’t Trying to Fat Shame, She’s a Natural

By Danceswithfat @danceswithfat

If She Wasn’t Trying to Fat Shame, She’s a NaturalI received this Facebook post from a blog reader Annette today with the note “I know that she’s wrong, but I don’t know how to break it down for her, can you help?”  Well Annette, I can try! Please not:  this is some fat shaming BS, if you’re not in the mood to deal with it you can skip the indented parts (which are quotes from the nonsense) and still get the gist of things. I’ll start with the quote in its entirety:

For those who didnt see my post, I posted a pic of a pair of shorts with a 70″ waist. I found them hilarious, and laughed all through the thrift store I saw them in. I meant no harm to any living being, and stated so in the post, nor was I trying to shame anyone who suffers with their weight. I, myself, have weighed 240 pounds. I have suffered with eating disorders my entire life, yet I was lectured by people who presumed that I was fat shaming people. What? So let me say… I send merit to all those who are obese. I pray that you can get this under control… NOT BECAUSE OF THE WAY YOU LOOK, but because obesity leads to heart issues, diabetes, depression, some forms of cancer, and an overall unhealthy life. I respect all human life, and am sorry for those who assumed that they knew I was intentionally implying something else. What a world we live in. Oh, and by the way, I am still laughing

The short answer of why this is wrong is because you can’t say “I respect all human life” while in the same breath engaging in stereotyping, fat shaming, and healthism. If you want to be credible you can’t just say “I respect all human life,” you have to actually do it.

Let’s break it down:

For those who didnt see my post, I posted a pic of a pair of shorts with a 70″ waist. I found them hilarious, and laughed all through the thrift store I saw them in. I meant no harm to any living being, and stated so in the post, nor was I trying to shame anyone who suffers with their weight.

So this person saw a pair of shorts made for a fat person, and then felt the need to tell everyone she could reach on social media that she found them “hilarious.” But she wasn’t “trying to shame anyone who suffers with their weight.” Riiiiiight.

I can’t imagine what she would have done differently if she had intended to shame fat people. If she wasn’t trying, then she’s a natural. By the way, this is exactly what I mean when I say that I’ve never suffered from my weight, but I have definitely suffered from fat shaming.

I, myself, have weighed 240 pounds. I have suffered with eating disorders my entire life, yet I was lectured by people who presumed that I was fat shaming people.  

Thanks for the PSA that internalized fatphobia is a thing.  The fact that this person used to be fat isn’t doing fat people much good right now is it? I’m sure some of her best friends are fat or whatever, but that doesn’t change the fact that this is fatphobic bullshit.

What?

YOU ARE FAT SHAMING! IT IS SHITTY! YOU SHOULD STOP! That’s what.

So let me say… I send merit to all those who are obese. I pray that you can get this under control… NOT BECAUSE OF THE WAY YOU LOOK, but because obesity leads to heart issues, diabetes, depression, some forms of cancer, and an overall unhealthy life.

You send merit? You can always tell that someone has a grossly over-exaggerated sense of self-importance when they think that they are in a position to grudging bestow honor on others. Fat people don’t need your “merit.”  We need shorts that fit us and not to be fat shamed.  We also don’t need your stereotypes, your prayers, or your healthism. Even if you somehow still believe that tripe that weight and health are the same thing, other people’s health is not your business. In truth, there are people of all sizes with heart issues, diabetes, depression, cancer and whatever the hell she means by  an “unhealthy life” and those people – like all people – deserve respect and access to healthcare, and nothing else about their health is anybody else’s business unless they ask us to make it our business. They should certainly not be used as cheap fodder to justify hand-wringing “Won’t somebody think about the health” fat shaming.

I respect all human life, and am sorry for those who assumed that they knew I was intentionally implying something else. What a world we live in. Oh, and by the way, I am still laughing

You don’t respect all human life.  Those who assumed that you were fat shaming are right. What a shitty fat shaming world we live in because people do crap like this. I’m not laughing. Fix it.

Inevitably people (probably this woman) will turn to the “Can’t you take a joke” defense, so I’ll end with a quick reminder that it’s totally messed up to ask groups of people to become better at being stigmatized and made fun of without complaint, so that other people can laugh at our expense without having to feel badly or have their atrocious behavior pointed out.

Want to help create a world where this kind of fat shaming is seen as completely unacceptable?

Click Here to Register for the Fat Activism Conference!

The Fat Activism Conference is all online, so you can listen by phone or on your computer wherever you are.  Plus you get recordings and transcripts of each talk so you can listen and read live and/or on your own schedule. The conference is happening October 6-8, 2017!

If you enjoy this blog, consider becoming a member or making a contribution.

Like this blog?  Here’s more cool stuff:

Become a Member! For ten bucks a month you can support fat activism and get deals from size positive businesses as a thank you.  Click here for details

Book and Dance Class Sale!  I’m on a journey to complete an IRONMAN triathlon, and I’m having a sale on all my books, DVDs, and digital downloads to help pay for it. You get books and dance classes, I get spandex clothes and bike parts. Everybody wins! If you want, you can check it out here!

Book Me!  I’d love to speak to your organization. You can get more information here or just e-mail me at ragen at danceswithfat dot org!

If you are uncomfortable with my selling things on this site, you are invited to check out this post.


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