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Hot Water Romance

By Ashleylister @ashleylister

Hot Water RomanceI did write this on Sunday... it has been sat in drafts all week.  Then I changed my mind so with a day to go I am changing it all.  I'm a woman, we are allowed to do things like that and if you complain I will call you sexist and wave a bra - not mine necessarily - filled with sharp projectiles, like stiletto shoes, in your general direction.
This week’s topic has had me thinking about all those old school rules and practices that have everyone in a tizz, particularly around Valentine’s Day.  How a cute idea can turn into some sexually political hot water amongst the old fashioned and contemporary daters amongst us.  (Before I go on I should point out my favorite flowers are anthuriums and white roses and my favorite chocolates are those Lindt Chocolate Ball things...)
The most contentious of the old fashioned rules is the “gentleman” paying for the first date.   My mom has gone on and on about me halving bills for years and I used to get really annoyed thinking it was so materialistic and antiquated.  But, if we want true equality let’s look at this in another light.  Look at how much it costs a woman before we even leave the house for a date.  There is a new outfit (always), make up, hair, all the beauticians trips for brows, lashes or whatever else you may need doing in the face of competition.  There is time spent in preparation, phone bills for hammering over strategy with the girls and time spent walking in shoes that absolutely murder our feet.  Men shower, shave and, if you are lucky, iron a shirt.  So after all this we should pay for our own drinks?  Really?
But should we expect more - why is chivalry wrong?  Courtship ritual is a part of nature and is the reason so many male birds outdo their female counterparts in the feather stakes with a glorious plumage.
But great romantic ideas don’t have to be expensive.  I still have one of my first Valentine’s presents, a little jigsaw that fits into a tiny jar with loves me, loves me not on it.  It was cute and different so I kept it.
I don't know, I'm sat on the proverbial fence at the moment over all this (slightly due to a recent date who seems to be one of the people who read this blog and he may be Valentines' potential - I like perfume too, did I mention that?  Miss Dior...)  So I'll finish now for my own sake.  Here is a poem I wrote a little while ago that I was going to read out last Friday until I thought I had lost it!
RomanceRomance is temporarily unavailable,He’s out of the office right now.You could email him if you really want,Follow @romance2012 on Twitter.He’s on a trip with Chivalry and Love,They are  at a conference somewhere.He left no address or number,No he hasn’t got a fax.Romance dead? Those reports are unconfirmed.The girls in PR are hopeful he’ll return.No he hasn’t left us, just taking a little break.He’ll be back soon, hopefully.Yes we know it’s been a while, no he hasn’t called.Run off with a woman?  It’s possible of course.But we will keep on working, looking to the dayWhen Romance will return and he will look our way.
Thanks for reading.
L x

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