CNN reports that the town of Nelson, Georgia, population 1,300, is considering a law that requires “every head of household residing in the city limits… to maintain a firearm, together with ammunition therefore.”
Well, every head of household except people with physical or mental disabilities, “paupers,” felons, and those who oppose gun ownership based on “belief” or religious doctrine.
The good news is that by the apparent wording, anyone who believes this is a bad idea may not have to participate.
3 Questions That Arise From This Law
1. What if six college kids live in a house, three of which are paupers, and three of which are trust fund kids who never do their dishes? Who is the “head of household?” And how drunk do college kids have to get before they are considered “mentally disabled?” These are the questions we want answered before these kids announce their next keg party on Twitter, preferably answered in 140 characters or less.
2. Is this town named after Simpsons bully Nelson Muntz? If so, shouldn’t sling-shots and “ha-ha’s” also be mandatory?
3. Just back to this whole “head of household” deal… is there an election to determine who is the head of each household? We’re going to assume “yes,” in which case we look forward to about 650 election campaign ads on Georgia TV! We envision ominous music with a narrator saying stuff like: “Your roommate, John Jenkins, never did his dishes all semester because he forgot to buy dishwasher detergent… can he really be trusted with a gun? Jenkins. Wrong for dishes. Wrong for Head Of Household.”
