Diaries Magazine

From Dilemma To Decision

By Chardonaldson
I've got a little dilemma.
I'm currently debating the wisdom of a decision I made a couple of months ago. I'm running a race this Sunday. Just four weeks after my marathon. And I don't really know how I'm planning to attack it.
Not sure what possessed me. Possibly I was high on something at the time. Like post-run endorphins. And they must have been pretty strong that day because my personal history has said that I take quite a long time to recover from marathons. I usually remember relevant personal history like that in plenty of time to prevent myself from doing spontaneous, injudicious stuff like that.
I think my rationale at the time was that it's peak race season in my part of the world and it'd be a pity to miss out on one in my back yard. And a bigger pity to miss out on one where a lot of my friends are running. And the race singlet's kind of nice. And I don't actually have to race it. And it's only 10k so that should be simple after a marathon - right?
I didn't factor into my decision-making at the time that I might have just been getting over a cold. And that the day before I'll be running my first significant long slow run since Gold Coast. But, hey, let's just pretend that I'm a person who thrives on challenges.
And while I'm pretending that I'm a person who thrives on challenges, I'll also pretend that I'm a person who loves hills. While it's not exactly a mountainous route, it's not exactly a flat one either. But I'm not complaining because, for the next couple of days only, I AM a hill-lover.
From Dilemma To Decision
I think that my current doubts about this event lie in something that I did the other day. I looked up previous race results. And the age group places for 'mature but not old yet' ladies (ie 50-59 y.o.) lie in my range. When I'm running well. Maybe not a month out from a marathon and when I have had a cold. But on the other hand, maybe ...
Sometimes I think I'm too competitive.
Sometimes I think that I think too much.
On Tuesday after speed I would have said that I was just going to take it easy and enjoy the event without pushing myself into the imminent puke zone. I struggled on my fourth 1600m rep and finished the session early. But on Wednesday I did an 11k tempo run with some fast bodies and finished up with a 4:58 average pace. And that flamed those little embers of competitiveness. 
Sure, there's no guarantee of a place even if I do run well. I have no idea who's running this event and there are some seriously fast 'mature but not old yet' ladies in Brisbane. Plus we all know that anything can happen on race day - and by that I mean unplanned toilet stops or accidents or toilet accidents. But there's a little part of me that wants to give it a shot.
Sometimes I'm really grateful that I have this blog because writing this post has actually helped give me clarity. I will just show up on Sunday and run how I feel. Like I've done with every other race that I've run this year. If I feel good I will push the pace and if I don't I'll just relax and enjoy the event.
Decision made.

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