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Even Yodeller From Price Is Right Probably Doesn’t Want To Go Over Fiscal Cliff… But If He Did Near The Cliff, What Would He Sing?

By Nottheworstnews @NotTheWorstNews

CNBC reports that a new study indicates that 67% of the top one percent of income earners in America support higher income taxes.

Unfortunately, when a large number of members of congress sign a pledge saying they won’t vote to raise taxes under any circumstances whatsoever, they got to stick by their pledge, even if they all know that by not voting on anything, everyone’s tax rates will go up.

Suddenly, we find ourselves missing the days when politicians just lied, instead of signing promises that are impossible to keep.

3 Christmas Carols We Hope Congress Sings This Christmas Eve

1. “While Shepherds Watched Their Stocks.” This song reminds us that Shepherds will be very sad if their favorite investment ConAgra Foods Inc., maker of sauces for Shepherd’s Pie, sees its stock go down if no deal can be reached.

2. “God Tax Ye Wealthy Gentlemen.” Naturally, we hope they sing the updated, socially equal version of the song that has lyrics about taxing wealthy women, and men who are not gentle. (We’re looking your way, Ted Nugent!)

3. “Do You Hear What I Hear?” Because we hear the majority of American’s want a compromise on the fiscal cliff, according to the polls we hear (We get Siri to read polls to us, rather than read them ourselves.) Maybe congress hasn’t heard this because Ted Nugent hasn’t referred to polls taken after 1979 in a song yet.

Do you have better Christmas Carols for Congress? Yes, you probably do! So feel free to name them in the discussion section below!


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