Dating Magazine

Eliminate the Hot Mess!

By Shauntee @shaunteebattie

Eliminate the Hot Mess!

I could write about how the dating world is different for thick women than it is for skinny women but I find that this blog would pretty much be useless. I think everyone regardless of weight is having a hard time in the dating pool right now. Does weight play a factor in the quality of person who hits on you? Yes, why? One thing that will never go away is stereotypes and stigmas. You know the ones I’m referring to we’re easy, we’re more giving, and we’re easily taken advantage of..yada yada yada. Now this may be true for some of us just as it may be true for a smaller woman, but what makes you stand out is your confidence, the way you carry yourself, and knowing your worth. Anybody who lacks these qualities would be more willing to date a person who simply uses them, only because they have a bad self image that they can’t do any better. If you feel you can’t do any better than guess what..you can’t.

One Saturday, my sister and I went to a bar and this one plus size woman got on the dance floor by herself in her tight mini and danced the night away. She got major play and men constantly hit on her. The skinny women nearby turned their noses up and one girl even got her ass on the dance floor and tried to drop it like it hot and fell…..yeah honey that’s classy! Now, I’m not saying these men were quality and I honestly feel like the bar/club scene is a horrible place to meet somebody. It ranks up there with the internet in my book, both only serve one purpose if you ask me…getting laid! None the less, it was her confidence that made her stand out. Nothing screams sexy more than confidence, confidence will take you far in this world and knowing your worth will take you even further.

Now I’m not saying being a plus size girl in a world that promotes being stick thin as beautiful is always easy, but as with anything else in this world you have to eliminate the hot mess. When I say Hot Mess, I mean the people who date plus size women for crazy ass reasons. Let’s see who we have

The Experimenter- This is the person who has never dated a plus size woman, but because one of their friends pulled a hit it and quit it on a plus size woman and bragged about how it was. This person now feels the need to experiment with a plus size woman. Nobody wants to be an experiment, if you want to experiment take your ass to the science lab and have a jolly good time. It’s the equivalent of dating a black woman just because you heard the saying “once you go black, you never go back”.

The User- Their sole mission is to use you because they know you have self esteem issues and trust me people can tell when you have self image issues. They come around for sex, money, and a home cooked meal. They treat you like shit and have very little regard for your feelings. Eventually you wake up and go upside their head with that cast iron skillet you just finish frying chicken in.

The Fetish Freak- This person has some weird fetish about plus size women and generally the bigger the better. You normally have to be 400lbs and up but they settle for slightly smaller too. They get off just seeing your fat and want you to do the weirdest things imaginable. They want you to sit on them, beat them, and make them crawl around like a dog while you sit there and eat a pack of bacon. You don’t have to have sex with this person they get off on being humiliated by your fat. That’s just strange and weird but hey whatever floats your boat.

The Undercover Lover- This person treats you like a queen behind closed doors, but they won’t acknowledge your ass outside the home. They don’t want people to know they like plus size women! You become their well kept secret but you know what they say what’s done in the dark always comes to light. You will eventually get out the house and catch this person out somewhere and the gig will be up. Take your Coach bag and wail on that ass!

The Coward- this is the person that truly does care for you but never makes a firm commitment. They are too scared of what their friends and family would think which is simply sad. Any woman should want someone who would be proud to be with her. They may have told a friend or family member about you and the first thing they ask is “you sure you like that” or “you can’t find anybody skinny. They neglect to ask you the important questions like “does she make you happy” or is “she good to you”. If you can’t stand up for me I got two words for you “Fu** off” nobody wants to be with someone who can’t stand up for them. In this case, it would be their lost, not yours. Grow some balls! They normally end up unhappy right along with the person who gave them that awful advice.

Know your worth, never settle, and know that you’re beautiful

Until we meet again♥

Eliminate the Hot Mess!


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