The end of 2012 was been a bit crazy for me. But, there were good things because I learned that I can move back to the Washington, DC area. Those of you who know me personally know that my best friend in the world is the co-owner of Richly Middle Class and our children have a special bond. I can hardly wait to live closer to them.
We moved to the United Kingdom when my child was four years old. To my amazement, when a child tells her, “You are my best friend!” she replies, “We can be good friends but my best friend is Amelia. She would be happy to let you play with us.”
Unless you are the mother of an only child, you don’t understand the joy that I feel to know that my child has bonded at such a young age. When I am a distant memory, my daughter will have a good friend in someone she met at the age of four.
This year, my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. As you are reading this post, she is in surgery having a mastectomy. I am not there with her because she could not bring herself to let me in time to return to the states or have the surgery earlier. So I sit here today feeling a bit helpless. So today I wait on pins and needles for news of how the surgery went.
During the last week of December, I spent time trying to arrange for someone to be with my mom during her surgery and the month after it when she will need help. I think it is important that she is home with a loving person. I truly believe that having the right support is important to a speedy recovery. I could not believe how hard it was to find help from my massive size family. Not all of this was my family’s fault. My mother went into a denial stage and tried to push everyone away at the last minute. But it was still difficult. In the end, all worked out and my wonderful cousin decided to come up and spend some time with her.
At the same time, I found out that my favorite aunt in the world was found passed out at her home. She is in intensive care.
So, to say the least, I was devastated that my mother did not want the cancer removed from her body and my aunt who gave me unconditional love growing up might not survive. All I could think of is that I could lose two of the most special people in my life.
You are probably wondering: What does this have to do with decluttering my life? It has a lot to do with it. Here are the thoughts that these recent events have sparked:
Life is not promised to anyone. My mother was the product of a teenage pregnancy. Only sixteen years separate us. Today could be her last day and I was not there for her. Today will hopefully be the beginning of a cancer-free life for her. But, you have to look at the worst case scenario and hope for the best. So today I will declutter my schedule and spend more time with my mother. Life does not give you a lot of second chances. If I get one, I will be better at spending time with my family.
Get rid of the clutter. Most of us sleep in bedrooms with stuff on the floor, on a chair or have a closest filled with stuff. I could not find a shoe match in less than five minutes if someone offered me a million dollars. Do you really need all of that stuff? No you do not! Make a vow that you will remove three things for every one thing that you bring in. You will declutter while still treating yourself. Today, I removed 20 pairs of shoes and clothing that I can not wear because my body has changed and I did not even make a dent in the things that I own.
Decluttering is not always about the material stuff. Sometimes it is about the emotional stuff as well. I had a boyfriend in high school (Chris) with whom I would not be intimate with because I did not want to get pregnant. He dumped me one week before my senior prom. I went off to college. I loved him (as far as high school love goes). During the summer, I came home. We hung out and he finally got what he wanted. He lied to everyone I knew about what had happened. I will tell you that I held onto that forever. “All men are scum! I will not fall in love,” I continued to say to myself.
That is crazy! Simply crazy. The truth is that he now lives in a trailer with six kids, no college degree, and he works at Taco Bell. (There is nothing wrong with that lifestyle at 46.) The point is: HE was not the right man for me. I have different dreams and ambitions.
Declutter your heart if you are feeling like this. Love is the greatest gift in the world if you give it to the right person. Don’t clutter your heart with past loves that probably did not deserve you.
Declutter your car. (Heather, don’t say a thing
There is nothing worse than a messy work place. You will be in a bad mood as soon as you hit your desk. Keep your space neat and clean, it will help you get into your daily routine more smoothly and relaxed. You will be more productive from the minute you hit your desk. And you will be able to find things too!
Forgive yourself. I struggle with this one on a daily basis. I make mistakes all the time. I will replay them over and over in my head until I am paralyzed with fear. Let go! Learn from your mistakes. Declutter your brain so you can learn and prepare for your next adventure.
Doubting. If I had a penny for every time I doubted my ability, I would be so wealthy. Stop it! Declutter your life of doubt. You are a good parent, child, employee, and friend. And you could be better if you leave doubt out of the equation.
Decluttering your life will offer you lots of benefits from a clutter-free home to a clutter-free heart. Most of life, I have thought about decluttering as having to remove things from my home, car, or desk. But decluttering is more than that. Emotionally we are just as cluttered as our physical environments.
What do you need to declutter in 2013?
