I have known a number of women who were molested (in two cases, by teenage boys) and they just got over it. Apparently they attempted to come to terms with and make peace with this and were successful. I am not bashing women who are damaged by this sort of thing, but to say that every woman who was molested as a girl is ruined forever is nonsense. People didn’t use to freak out about this stuff so much and apparently the damage was much less.
My mother told me that he deceased sister was molested a little girl. They found the guy who did it and I do not know what happened to him. The attitude back then was, “Oh don’t worry about that. He’s just a stupid fool acting like an idiot. He was wrong to do that to you. You best just forget about that for now. It’s not important. But don’t let any males do that to you again.”
My mother said she suffered absolutely no damage whatsoever from this.
I can’t help thinking we are making a bad thing worse. A girl gets molested. We find out and flip out and try to prosecute the guy, which in many cases, is the right thing to do. But in many cases, he just gets away with it. We scream and yell, “Oh that was a horrible thing that was done to you! How awful! How terrible! You must be so damaged and ruined and destroyed over this!” We rush them into therapy with some dingbat feminist therapist who treats this as a much bigger deal that it probably was. The theme is, “You were violated! You were damaged! You will be ruined forever unless we fix you now!” And maybe even, “You will always suffer damage from this, but we are here to lessen the damage.”
Tell people they got damaged and they are going to act damaged. Exaggerate a violation and people feel a lot more violated and a lot worse.
I can’t help thinking we are not doing this right.
